MarcusMcRae wrote:
JamesFeinberg wrote:
The really sad part is how it happened in the first place...
Do tell?
Well dang, if you're going to drag it out of me!
Dateline: 1972, Disney World in sunny FLA
Do you remember those rides that were sort-of like go-karts but they were on a rail so you couldn't veer off course? They had a "gas" and a brake and while they were confined to the rail, you could still steer them around a bit until they hit the actual rail.
Whelp, there I was, a young undiscovered driving prodigy at the tender age of 4 and I was about to make my big debut! We got on the ride and while my Dad initially took over the "driving" responsibilities, I decided by turn 2 that he wasn't getting it done! I mean, come on, my Mom and brother were gaining on us from behind and we were getting ready to lose any advantage we gained from our superior qualifying skills!
So while screaming something like "Dad, you need to stick with the family wagon, you wanker!" I pushed him out of the way and took over the controls myself. Needless to say, we were able to pull out the win and, much to my surprise, wow the crowd in the process! Apparently they were shocked to see somebody navigate the entire course without ever lifting while simultaneously keeping a perfect line. An over-sized rodent in the crowd was heard to say "That kid looks like he is on rails!"
What does any of this have to do with my back? I'm getting there sparky, be patient.
As soon as we exited the ride, um, I mean track, we were whisked away to a private meeting room where some park officials wanted to discuss my "potential". Apparently they were so impressed that the owner of the joint (I think it was the same floppy-ear'd rodent from the "crowd" but it's hard to say) tried to get me to sign a "development" contract right on the spot. Well, I'm no lawyer, but after reading over the contract and seeing the ridiculous terms and conditions, I threw the thing back in his face and proclaimed "I'm not signing this Mickey Mouse contract! Who do you think I am? Goofy?" Yep, it was that ugly of a scene!
Slightly disheartened but definitely undeterred, my Dad decides that we are going to show them! We head out to the family wagon in the parking lot (actually, it took us 4 hours to find it with the help of some park officials but that is another story) and my Dad proceeds to strip the thing down. Yep, right there in the Disney World parking lot! Looking not unlike Taz (the spinning devil, ya know), he takes off everything that isn't needed in a real race car. After mounting my booster seat and fashioning some pedal extenders, I was ready to roll!
Now, being the good racers we were, we figured we should test a little before kicking some rodent butt. My brother and Mom made a make-shift course in the far end of the parking lot and I staged at the starting line. To get a little better launch, I power-braked it and sped off towards turn 1. This is where our plan went horribly wrong! While I was a strapping 4-year-old, I wasn't prepared for the sheer muscle it was going to take to navigate turn one in a 4000lb family wagon without power steering. My Dad, bless his heart, in an attempt to make the car as fast and light as possible, removed the power steering from the wagon.
Needless to say, as I turned in for turn 1 and the car took a set, the force transmitted back through the steering rack ripped the wheel from my hands causing me to tweak my back in the process. Seriously, what were we thinking? Tip: If you're going to put your 4-year-old in a "race car", make sure it has power steering!
On the bright side, I only spent 3 years in traction and another 6 in therapy and I'm as good as new! Luckily "the Disney incident" happened when I was young so I was able to bounce back pretty quickly.
Well, you asked! It wasn't a pretty story but at least it is the truth. *cough*
Jim
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